Wednesday, June 10, 2009

In Which I Prove The Economy Is In The Toilet Without Really Trying

I don't talk a whole lot about work here. One reason is because it isn't a fiscally sound thing for me to do, given that the blogosphere is WIDE OPEN to the ENTIRE WORLD.

It's fine if I praise, laud and honor the place that provides food, clothing, and a place to live for my family, but if I have a bad day and want to spew forth venom just to get things off my quite ample chest I could find myself in the same situation many people are nowadays.

And that would be unemployed.

Ain't gonna happen.

However, from time to time there are interesting tidbits I like to share. One of these is happening as we speak.

I had a part-time person decide to leave for greener fields at the first of the month. I need to fill the position, so I asked the HR Department to post the job for me. Usually they will use a local not-for-profit job finder website and the company electronic bulletin board. This time, however, they tried something new.

They posted it on Career Builder.

And may I just say this about that?


Within two hours after the posting went up I had 22 applicants for the job. That number was increased by 50 this morning, and no matter how hard I worked to go through resumes and knock it back down all throughout the day, there were still 45 left for me to go through when I left work this evening. They multiplied like rabbits. Or guppies.

It was like playing Tetris all day long. I'd get rid of ten resumes, and an L-shaped one would come through and gum up the works because they were applying for a full-time job instead of a part-time job.

Hint #1 to job seekers: Nothing ticks off a future employer more than wasting their time. If you want a full-time job, apply for full-time jobs ONLY. Especially if the potential employer is trying to wade through 3,432 applications and her head is about to explode all over your resume anyway.

Hint #2 to job seekers: Do NOT apply more than one time for a job, especially if you aren't qualified in the first place. Yes, times are tough. But even tough times don't make you able to snarfle widgets if all your education and experience is in health care. Even part-time. Especially if you're looking for a full-time job. See Hint #1.

Hint #3 to job seekers: Be original in your approach and don't kiss hiney. The cover letters I've seen the past couple of days are so obviously sucking up and using such "High English" that it's obvious they were taken from a book or web site containing examples of the same. For goodness sakes, USE YOUR BRAIN. Come up with something original! Use a little humor! Don't "brown nose" your way through it, just state facts.

Hint #4 to job seekers: Two words. SPELL CHECK. I can't tell you how many misspelled words there were in almost every other resume. Being as that's a pet peeve of mine, they stuck out like a sore thumb.

Tomorrow is my last day of work for the week. I'm cutting off applications on Friday because I don't want the email servers to overload and I don't want to be going through these things until this time next year. Wish me luck as I wade through the deep.

I only hope I don't go under.

Update: As of 8:30 a.m. 6/11/09 the count was back up to 65. I cut off applications immediately thereafter.


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