Thursday, March 12, 2015

Oh Deer...


Yesterday we found a visitor in our side yard.

Well, we didn't so much find him as we SMELLED him.

We don't normally go into the side yard unless we're mowing the grass, and as that hasn't been a priority because...WINTER...we missed the fact that a deer had decided to make our home his final resting place.

Keeled over and gave up the ghost, right there in the yard.  The deer was deceased.  It had passed on. It was no more.  It ceased to be.

This was a late deer.*

To say we were thrilled just doesn't cover the depth of our emotion.

I called the Animal Control desk as soon as we discovered our special little gift, but they were closed for the evening.  Apparently animals don't need controlling 24/7.  I waited until bright and early this morning to call again.  This time I got a human being.

"Animal Control, how may I help you?"

"We seem to have acquired a dead deer at our address.  Would you please come and dispose of him/her/it?"

"Well, we'll come out and take a look, but if it's on private property we may not be able to help you."

"Q)@#(Q&%%*($^E*^*)!!!!!!!"

That last sentence didn't really happen.

After some discussion, Animal Control agreed to come out and look at the deer.  They wouldn't take it away, but they would certainly set eyes on it for us.  Our tax dollars are hard at work!

When the truck came by before I left for work, I asked the "looker" what could be done next.  He said he would be in contact with the Public Works Department, and they would look to see if they could haul it away for us.  The only reason they would be able to do so is because the decomposing deer was in full view of the street.

Otherwise, we would have to either have a barbeque or find a pack of wolves to assist us.

Suburbia...you gotta love it.

When last I spoke with Hubster, he informed me that our dear deer was no more.  The Public Works people apparently took pity on us and hauled it off.

The deer has rung down the curtain and joined the choir invisible.

This was an ex-deer.*



*(with apologies to Monty Python...)

1 comment:

Susanne said...

Oh my. That would be quite the surprise to find.