Saturday, April 05, 2008

Not That I Feel Threatened Or Anything, But Does Anyone Have Any Bullet-Proof Underwear I Can Borrow?

My Most Excellent Hairdresser does not usually read blogs, so it was with some surprise I learned today that I am somewhat of a celebrity in the salon.

You see, I forwarded her this particular blog post, since it contained information I knew she'd enjoy, yea even gloat over. And little did I know that she forwarded it on to LO! MANY OF HER OTHER CLIENTS!

So now? I'm known far and wide, at least in my own little corner of Hairdom, as "The Bang Lady."

It's an awesome responsibility really, but one I intend to uphold with all my might.

But just to make sure I don't get out of line again, My Most Excellent Hairdresser told me to make note of THIS little article:

Hairdresser Shoots Angry Client In The Butt

Washington - A hairdresser shot an unhappy client after she complained about her haircut, police said.

Lauren Newton, 28, was getting her hair cut on Thursday at the home of Monique Reed when the two began to argue about the style, police said.

"She (Reed) went to the bedroom, got a gun, fired a shot in the ceiling," Police Chief James Blyth said.

Newton, who was trying to flee with her sister, was then shot in the lower back, he said.

Reed, 38, was charged with aggravated assault and reckless endangerment.

She remained in jail in this southwestern Pennsylvania town in lieu of $50 000 bond.

Newton's injuries were not considered life threatening.

She was taken to a hospital in nearby Pittsburgh for treatment.

The district magistrate's office said Reed had not listed an attorney as of late on Thursday.

Um, do you think full body armour is in season now at the Cut-N-Curl?

Yeah, I thought not.

In that case, I'll be askin' y'all to pray a hedge of thorns round about me sometime in May when I have my next appointment. And I KNOW you'll do it.

Because nobody could possibly have bullet-proof underwear that's big enough for me, and besides, it would be just too gross to loan it out. Get serious, now.

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