Monday, September 28, 2009

In Which I Become Queen of the Family - At Least for the Night

Last night the troops were hungry.

It's nothing new. It happens every 2.5 hours in our household. Someone is always saying, "What's for _____(dinner, lunch, breakfast)? Is there anything to EAT in this house? I'm STARVING!"

Most of the time I bat them away like annoying flies. "Shoo!" I say. "Go 'way kid. You bodda me."

Last night, however, I took pity on the masses and decided to actually cook. Or something that resembled cooking. In a roundabout way. Of sorts. Somehow.


I browned some ground beef with onion and taco seasoning and layered it in a casserole dish. I covered that with a layer of pinto beans (since I was out of black beans). Next was a layer of our favorite taco sauce. Then I made the famous Velveeta "cheese" dip by melting Velveeta and adding a can of Ro-Tel spicy tomatoes and poured the whole thing over the top of the other stuff.

(We believe in technical terminology here at HUW. Only the best for our readers. Later on we may add some other things to the stuff. Just you wait and see. Let me know if it goes above your head and I'll try to explain it in a more germane way.)

As you can probably tell, this is sizing up to be a heart attack in a casserole dish.

I chopped up some scallions and threw them on top, "baked" it in the microwave until everything got hot, broke out the Frito Lay Scoops and sour cream, and called the hogs to the trough.

Pseudo-Daughter was there to eat with us. Everyone piled in to the kitchen table, Hubster said grace, and the feeding frenzy began.

I don't think I've seen anything quite like it before. It's a wonder we all survived without someone losing a limb, exploding, or choking on inhaled food products. You'd think I never feed these people.

Somewhere between the "Mom, this is AWESOME!"-s, the "OH MY GOODNESS!"-es, the "Can you make this again?"-s, the chomping, the seconds, thirds and FOURTHS, I became Queen of All I Surveyed.

Granted, all that I surveyed was a dirty kitchen, dirty dishes, and an even dirtier house. But by golly, I was Queen of It All.

Tonight when we go back to take-out I will lose my crown. But oh, it was glorious while it lasted!

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