Wednesday, August 19, 2009

The Snit Hits The Fan

I am in a snit.

If I was an airplane I'd be leaving a black plume of smoke behind me.

If I was on the ground looking up at the black plume of smoke I'd call the EPA and the airline and complain to high heaven, right before I picked a fight with the first person to cross my path.

If I was the person who got an earful from me I'd smack me in the nose right before I kicked a dog.

If I was the dog who just got kicked I'd bite the kicker and then proceed to pee on her leg.

If I was the guy from the pound that picked up the dog for biting and peeing, I'd go out and have a margarita or two right after my shift ended.

If I was the wife of the guy from the pound I would give him the cold shoulder all night because he came home drunk.

And then I could go back to bed and forget the whole day ever happened.

Sounds like a plan to me.


Anonymous said...

Mercy... that's bad... whatsa matta? (Dont you hate it when you're almost over being in a snit and someone asks what you were in a snit for in the first place, then you get in an even bigger snit cause you have to go over why you were in a snit in the first place?????)


Linds said...

Ah of THOSE days. Health advisory: All sensible people wear stainless steel bowls on head for safety reasons.

I issue the advisory with great frequency!