Monday, June 08, 2009

Normal Sanity Regained, Although That's A Relative Term for Me

We are home.

Normal routines are back in place, barring the fact that the car is in the shop. The Girl suggested I ride the bus today rather than drive her car to work.

"Why, what a wonderful idea!" I said.

And then she was soundly vetoed.

Back to yesterday...

As we all know, Momma Don't Do Hot. And it was HOT yesterday.

After we left the hotel we headed out to eat lunch, then went shopping. The Boy scored shorts and shirts, but I drew the line at an $80 pair of Nike Shox. Yes, I know they're usually a lot more than that. Yes, I realize that even on clearance online they're more than that. And I'll probably go back at the end of the summer and buy them. It's just that I have a VERY hard time buying shoes that cost that much for a kid when my own shoes cost less than $20.

Because I am cheap thrifty.

And while we were shopping, one of us had to stay in the car the entire time, because if we unhooked the battery cable and left the car unlocked so we could get back into it, that meant all of our worldly possessions were also left up for grabs. Anyone could just open the door, pop the trunk and make off with our soggy swimming suits, our sub-par clothing, our used toiletries, or worst of all, CLARABELLE. And since I had no desire to be both hot and drag Clarabelle all over creation with me, I instead gave the debit card to The Girl or left her in the car while I went with The Boy in search of Perfect Khakis.

He was worse than I am at shopping. The kid not only does not know what size he wears, but is unaware of what a price tag is or how to use one. The term "on sale" escapes him completely. "Buy One, Get One Free" is a slang term used by gangs in the 'hood and he will have no part of it.

We almost came to blows more than once, this manchild and I.

Finally we were tired out. The score was KIDS = 324, MOM = ZERO. I got not one outfit the entire trip. The only thing I wanted was a pair of sandals. That's all, just one pair of sandals that I could wear to work. But all the time away was spent shopping at Rue 21, American Eagle, Nike, Belk, and other stores. I was out. of. luck.

We headed back home, arriving around 9 p.m. After winding down a bit I headed straight for bed and slept the best sleep I've ever slept in my entire life.

It's good to be home where the normal crazies are.

There's no place like home.

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