Tonight it's just me, a cuppa decaf and a jar of hot fudge.
It was an emotional day.
After an early coffee date with HeyJules, there was the every-Saturday-from-nine-to-twelve cleaning out of Mom's house. It's getting down to the nitty-gritty now. We worked on all the cabinets in the basement. I don't know how much longer we can put off finishing the kitchen, the treasure table and the case of collectibles.
Something inside me both wants to be done with this forever and at the same time wants it to last forever. It's quite a dilemma, being as I can't have both.
Since Mom chose to be buried so far away, it's as if the house is the only place we can go to "visit" her. It's where we both remember her best, where we grew up, and where she lived for over forty years. It's hard to dismantle it and it will be harder still to sell it. However, it's impractical for us to consider keeping it as our own special retreat, our home away from home, so sell it we will.
Even though it breaks our hearts to do so.
We ended today's session early. Neither Sis nor I had the heart to be there, so we did what we could to progress and then left half an hour before we normally do. Our respective piles of stuff will someday find their way to our homes. It's happening bit by bit. Time marches on.
And after that was over with, The Girl decided she needed me to go with her to get her hair done for the Sweetheart Dance. Now, usually that wouldn't bother me. But today? Seeing how beautiful she looked at the tender age of seventeen, picturing her as she will look in not too many years from now as a bride, knowing The Boy was also going to this dance in a SUIT, knowing he would not be around that much longer either....
And knowing Mom would not be here to see any of it, just about did me in.
So here I sit, with my friends Hot Fudge and Coffee. Forgive me if I indulge. And forgive me if I forget to invite you along.