Monday, August 04, 2008

In Which I Once Again Win The Mother Of The Year Award Without Really Trying

Yesterday it was time to get The Boy a haircut.

I knew it was time to get The Boy a haircut not because the hair was hanging down below his eyeballs, which it was, but because The Boy himself TOLD me it was time to get him a haircut.

So off to SuperCuts we went.

Because I called all the other places, and sweet potato pie on a stick! They want a house with ACREAGE to give a fourteen-year-old a few snips with the scissors nowadays. Honestly!

The Boy hopped into the chair and told the gal who was to be his stylist that he wanted an inch off of his hair all over. Because I kid you not when I tell you that he and Samson were in a contest to see who could grow the longest locks until I put a halt to that nonsense. So the "stylist" began to cut. And snip. And style.

And during all the cutting I decided it would be wise to make sure that the sheepdog I call my son could actually SEE out of the orbs he calls eyes when all was said and done. I walked up to where he and the "stylist" were and said only this:

"Would you please make sure his hair is cut above his eyebrows? Thanks so much."

Honestly. That's ALL I said. And then I sat down.

Fifteen minutes later I looked up from the magazine I was reading to see The Boy walking toward me with an expression on his face that had no equal. And I immediately knew why.

The "stylist" had cut his bangs a full inch and a half above his eyebrows.

He looked like the little Dutch boy. And he was about to cry. And so was I.

In a daze, I brushed hair off of his shoulders and began the first of a million apologies for the day. I paid the "stylist" and we left. I apologized again and again. He just sat there, covering his forehead with his hand so no one would see what a "dork" he looked like. The worst part about it is that he has Freshman photos to take in two weeks.

Oh yeah, I felt like sludge.

So tomorrow we're going to get him another haircut. Shorter, but stylish. One that has room to grow back out to the shag cut he had before. And we'll pray really hard that it looks really good.

Because I really would like for my son to like me again.


Linds said...

If he lived in this house, he may have had a mother brandishing scissors atacking his hair. I cut David's hair. I am alive and he is still talking to me.
Actually - he looks good!

HeyJules said...

Why in the name of all that is holy did you NOT take him to see Fab??? You know she wouldn't cut those bangs too short!!!!!

Sean said...

linds, all due respect, and I'm sure that you're a wonderful stylist, but Mom tried that once with me. The results were not pleasant. Thankfully she learned her lesson. More or less.

Chris said...

Because Fab charges $18 and SuperCuts costs $12.

Because Fab cut his hair last time and he came away telling me he still needed a haircut.

Because he doesn't like Fab's because it's a "girl" place.

So now all I'm allowed to do is sit in the car and listen to tunes while he goes in to get his hair cut, and then when he's done - AND ONLY THEN - I'm allowed to pay for it.

Because he's just so good to me that way.


Chris said...

And hey, you ungrateful lout of a son, at least I had enough sense to take you to someone who knew what they were doing so the damage could be repaired!

I could've left you with that stripe down your head...

Anonymous said...

My grandfather was a barber, and on visits used to "trim my bangs" for me.... until one day he shaved off my eyebrows - yes, both of them - so I started school that year with bandaids over my non-existant eyebrows and told everyone I had been in an accident and had cuts there!!! I was only about 8 years but remember this like it was yesterday!!! ACK!!!!!


groovyoldlady said...

You paid money? For a guy's haircut?


Woman, you can buy an electric razor for the price of ONE haircut.

Buzzzzzzzz - a little longer on top, shorter everywhere, a little gel to spike it up and you are golden. Golden, I tell you!!!

Trust me in this!

Linds said...

Maybe I should mention the time I put highlights in my daughter's hair - she is still in need of therapy after having to live with round circles of stunning highlights. She had the dalmation look. It cost me lots.

Sean said...

"Ungrateful lout of a son"?!?!

For the "someone who knew what they were doing" you took me to the cosmetology school... A student...

Chris said...

Then again, I could've shaved your little pointed head bald and called it a day.


The thanks I get.

At least the student was supervised...